


The Lad's List: One Shots

by Canadiantardis



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Based on The Lads List, Fluff, Gen, Humor, In a way anyway its stupid fluff, One Shot Collection, Or the lads lasses, POV Multiple, Team Lads is very dumb, The lads should never be left to their own devices, Wizard of Oz References, also really wanna now call lindsay tina meg team lasses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-05-25 08:39:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6187768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canadiantardis/pseuds/Canadiantardis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of one shots inspired by dragonslastarc's fic about the list that slowly grows.</p><p>AKA: These boys need to be stopped before the entire building goes for their blood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Number 90

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dragonslastarc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonslastarc/gifts).
  * Inspired by [The Lad's List](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3429455) by [dragonslastarc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonslastarc/pseuds/dragonslastarc). 

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Number 90. Handing giant lollipops to Kerry and Jeremy and trying to get them to sing the song from the Wizard of Oz was very hurtful and next time Geoff will let Matt and Miles beat the shit out of you for making them cry.
> 
> AKA: The reason Gavin can't watch Wizard of Oz drunk while talking to Michael.

When Ray walked into the office and saw Gavin and Michael laughing, he knew it was going to be a good day.

He sat down beside Michael and wheeled to face the other lads with a raised eyebrow.

“So, ladies, what are we giggling about today?” He asked as they turned to face him, Gavin failing to smother his laughter.

“Alright, so you know the Wizard of Oz, right?” Michael answered with a question of his own, and Ray just nodded, waiting for more of an explanation. “Well, Gav and I have been planning, and we thought of a really fun prank to do.”

“Really? Care to indulge me in this plan?” Ray smiled. “Sounds like it’ll be fun.”

* * *

 

During lunch, Michael and Gavin raced around the entire building looking for their predetermined victims, and anyone who knew the lads knew something was about to happen, but kept out of their way.

Their poor victims didn’t know their fate as Michael and Gavin found them, asking for help in the office, knowing the others wouldn’t be there during lunch.

“What do you need help with?” Jeremy asked as they entered the main office, where only Ray sat by his desk, hiding the grocery bag Michael brought to work with him in the morning. “You said something about a video?”

“Yeah, yeah, we wanted to try to do something fun.” Gavin said with a wide grin, heading over to his own desk and taking his phone out, already starting to record what was happening.

Thirty minutes later, and they had just started to get Jeremy and Kerry to at least say the words to the song when Geoff opened the door, surprising the lads and allowing the poor victims time to run, both heading to their closest friends in the building.

“What the hell was going on? Were they crying?” Geoff asked as he saw the quickly retreating forms of Jeremy and Kerry from the door.

“C’mon Geoff, just having a laugh.” Gavin defended, the phone still recording and held close so he could see what he was recording, and to protect it from what was most likely going to happen.

The other two were just laughing at how everything went down when they heard shouts of anger calling for the lads’ heads, and running feet heading to the main office and Gavin trilled, half in mock fear, half in laughter as Matt Bragg and Miles stormed in, held back by Geoff who still hadn’t left his place by the door.

“What the hell?” Matt shouted, his normally neutral face set into a deep frown. “I know Jay’s short but that’s just low.”

Michael and Ray couldn’t help but laugh while Gavin gave a fake sheepish look, his trilling laugh coming back when Miles threatened another step closer and the Brit jumped behind Michael, his phone still recording everything.

“Okay, okay okay, wait, hold up.” Geoff held his arm out to bar the two angry employees from harming any of the lads with a tired ‘why me’ look as he faced the three laughing young men. “What did you do?”

Ray offered his best explanation, his chuckles calming down quickly.

“So, these bozos had a brilliant idea to re-enact one of the songs from Wizard of Oz.” He said, jutting a thumb to Gavin and Michael, who both cried ‘Hey!’

Geoff already heard enough and sighed heavily. He turned to Miles and Matt, more or less ordering the two to stand down while he spoke to his employees.

Reluctantly, Miles and Matt just gave the lads an annoyed look before heading out, most likely to comfort the two vertically challenged victims, and Geoff gave his best ‘dad disapproving’ face.

“I don’t even want to know everything. If you ever do that again, I will not stop those two from beating the shit out of you.” He said before any of the lads could speak, heading to Ryan’s desk.

“What are you doing with Rye’s desk, Geoff?” Gavin asked while the other two looked around to see what Geoff was apparently looking for.

“You’ll see.” He said as Jack entered the office, apparently oblivious to what had happened just a couple minutes ago.

“Hey guys. Did you even have lunch?” He asked Ray and the others before noting the paper Geoff lifted with a flourish. “What is- Again?”

Ray saw the paper, with the words in chunky black badly made bubble letters printed on the top, “THE LAD’S LIST” and he groaned.

“Seriously, Geoff? It was just a one-time thing.” He said as Gavin and Michael noticed the paper as well and began to crowd their boss.

“It better. This is to make sure you fucking listen.” Geoff grumbled, his messy handwriting adding to the incredibly long list.

“Wow, you idiots actually made it to ninety rules now.” Jack shook his head as he headed to his own desk, sitting heavily on his chair. “If we have to make it a hundred, I’m grounding all your asses for a month.”

“Aww, c’mon, it was all in good fun!” Gavin defended.

Geoff grunted sarcastically, throwing a tired glare at the Brit.

Ray made a bet later in the week the list would reach 100 before the month was up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't plan on writing one shots for all them, but by god I'm gunna be writing quite a lot of them. They are seriously so funny. You have to read the list dragonslastarc wrote.


	2. Number 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are not Vav, you cannot fly and you should not jump off the roof of the bungalow to prove that you can.
> 
> AKA, Gavin might have been a little drunk while they played Minecraft one day.

It’s normally said, when someone asks Gavin a question, 99% of the time, he is surprisingly correct.

So when the question of, “If you could have any superpowers, what would yours be?” is asked, Gavin and the lads obviously thought he did.

“I’m Vav! Course I have powers, you doughnuts. I can fly.” He said reasonably as the other five laughed at his answer. “What? Think I can’t? I’ll prove it!”

That caused Ray and Michael to immediately egg him on, and before any of the Gents truly understood what Gavin was going on about, there were three empty chairs in the middle of a Let’s Play, and echoing laughter was all that was left of the Lads.

“Is he…?” Geoff asked slowly, already getting out of his chair and heading to the door.

“He better not.” Jack grumbled, following Geoff. Ryan had already left before Geoff even spoke, looking for the ever troublesome younger men.

The two were searching for a good five minutes before one of the newer interns pointed out they heard hysterical giggling out by the bungalow and someone shouting about something. Jack thanked the intern before the two Gents jogged over to the outside of the bungalow, already hearing said laughter and shouting.

“Get your ass down here now, Gavin!” They heard Ryan shout. “Are you really this stupid?”

“Course he is, Rye-bread!” Michael cackled, and the other two soon joined Ryan and two third of team Lads, Michael holding Gavin’s cell phone as if recording something on the roof of the bungalow. “He’s an absolute idiot.”

“Let’s just hope he doesn’t dive like an idiot.” Ray commented, as chill as talking about the fucking weather and finally Geoff understood what he was seeing.

Gavin stood on the top of the bungalow with hands on his hips, squinting down at the five other Achievement Hunters with the sun in his face, edging towards the edge of the building and Geoff wasn’t sure which mode to go to; Concerned Dad mode, or Furious-but-internally-worried Dad.

“Gavin! How the hell did you get up there?” Jack shouted in surprise.

Gavin pointed behind him, and called down to them, “There’s a window.”

“Gavin David Free, get your skinny white British ass down here right now!” Geoff shouted up to the Brit, concerned and angry at the boy for even thinking of going up to the roof like a fucking lunatic. “Or so help me God, I will massacre you so bad your nose will look normal!”

Gavin seemed to falter at the threat, but Michael and Ray tried to egg him on further.

“C’mon, Vav! Prove you can fly!” Ray called, laughing lightly when Ryan whacked the back of his head. “Hey, c’mon, it’s not like he could die from the fall, right? It’s only one floor.”

“We do not need an ambulance to come to this building, assholes!” Jack cried, whirling angrily to face Michael and Ray. “Do you want the company to suffer for something as fucking idiotic as Gavin hurting himself by jumping off a roof? He’s a giant klutz, walking at an incline is a challenge for him.”

That seemed to sober up the two lads on the ground, Ray still rubbing his head from where Ryan had whacked him, and Michael pursing his lips and lowering the cell phone.

“Hey, asshole, get down. The geezers are threatening with actual murder now.” Michael called up to Gavin, who hadn’t seemed to hear everything Jack had said.

After the small heart failure Jack and Geoff experienced, they yelled and scolded the three young men for a good half hour for doing something stupid and for leaving in the middle of a Let’s Play.

It didn’t sink into their heads not to pretend they are characters they play until after more or less calling their better halves about what was going on and bringing back the paper with Geoff’s large and crude bubble letters about what the Lads’ were now banned from doing or saying.

And Geoff thought they would get it through their thick skulls after they brought it up the first time with only twenty rules. He just hoped they wouldn’t need to add any more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halfway through writing this, I realized I didn't know how big a bungalow was. I thought it was maybe 2 floors or something. Turns out I was very much wrong, so what I had written didn't make a lot of sense and had to change a bit, but it doesn't sound as good as what I originally wrote.  
> This also briefly implies the two after, about X-Ray and Mogar.


	3. Number 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 37\. Stop hiding things Jeremy needs on high shelves. He almost fell off one last week and we do not need accident reports.
> 
> AKA: The Lads need to stop being mean to short people.

The first time was funny, Jeremy understood that. All his friends, as he got older and yet never grew, did that at one point or another. They would hide or have things he needed in plain sight far above his reach, and his attempts to get them back were obviously funny to anyone who was tall enough to reach the taller shelves.

But after the fifth time of Jeremy searching for his god damn mouse only to find it on the top shelf and no one around tall enough to reach it easily, Jeremy was starting to get tired of all the height jokes. But it was the lads, the three that seemed to blur the lines between funny and downright dangerous so easily, you’d swear they were doing them on purpose.

Trying to find a good thing to stand on, he found a questionable box that _looked_ stable enough to hold his weight, at least long enough for him to grab his mouse.

“Seriously? Why my _mouse?_ ” He muttered to himself as he pulled the box over to the shelves, getting up before realizing he was still too short even on the tips of his toes to reach the high shelf, the cord of his mouse mere centimeters as if taunting him. “God damn it.”

He stared up at his mouse, eyes narrowed as he resigned to trying to jump to get it. He tensed his legs, but as soon as he was about to spring up to get the mouse cord, the box decided it was time to break, and with a shout of surprise, Jeremy grabbed wildly to steady himself, grabbing the frame of the shelves by accident, and all he could think of was how glad he was there wasn’t anything sharp in that particular bookshelf as he slipped off the broken box and the entire thing came falling after him, loud thuds as everything crashed down around him and on him, the bookshelf coming down on him as well.

Having heard the shout and the resulting crash, Ryan came to investigate and nearly shouted in alarm as he saw the downed bookshelf and what looked comically like the Witch of the East from The Wizard of Oz.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” He called, looking around to see if the person’s head was under the small avalanche or not, sighing in relief as he saw Jeremy’s slightly dazed face, his hands the only thing keeping the shelves off him. “What the hell happened?”

“Ughh…” Jeremy took a couple moments to clear his head as Ryan helped him out from under the bookshelf, relieved himself the thing wasn’t too heavy. “They hid my mouse again, box broke, and I grabbed that, and well, everything fell and wow does that hurt.”

“Again?” Ryan gave a sharp sigh before shooing Jeremy from helping with cleaning up. “No, you sit down. I’ll move everything out of the way, and the jackasses can put everything away properly.”

“You sure? Will they even clean up?” Jeremy asked, and again Ryan sighed.

“Well, Michael is normally good with cleaning, so we might be able to.” He guessed before turning. “I’m going to get Geoff and the lads. You’re okay now? Not too hurt, yeah?”

“Yeah. Just a little dazed, but that’s fine.” Jeremy waved away the concern. “It takes a lot more than a small bookshelf to keep me down.”

They both chuckled before parting ways, and the next day, word had gone around that another rule was up for the lads, and he sighed. Hopefully that would actually deter them from hiding his shit on shelves he couldn’t reach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As someone who is 5'4, I take offense to the short jokes, since compared to a lot of people I know, I'm taller than them.


	4. Number 44

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 44\. Literally trapping Ryan in a hole so he "knows how the fuck poor Edgar feels! No way in! No way out!" is not funny nor will Geoff stop Ryan from exacting his revenge.
> 
> AKA, Sometimes the lads can't tell the difference between reality and a video game.

It should have been suspicious when Michael and Ray were gone from work for almost a week, and no one could decipher the bullshit Gavin came up with to explain them missing.

It should have also been suspicious at how often Gavin would ask Ryan how tall he was and sizing him up before leaving the office with his phone in his hands.

And Jack still wonders how they could have been so stupid. Then again, they normally underestimate the ‘jokes’ made by the lads until it was too late.

It started around lunch on what felt like a regular Friday, everyone was ready for the weekend and a bit of a break. They just had to record a couple more let’s plays and send them to get them edited, and Jack was honestly tired by lunch.

Gavin had pounced in the room with an overly toothy grin as he seemed to stalk up to Ryan and pulled him after him, saying something about how he needed help with something. And he wasn’t taking no for an answer.

Before either Jack or Ryan could react, the door burst open again and now Michael and Ray bolted through, running laps around Ryan like puppies around their mother. Next thing any of them in the room knew, Ryan and the lads were gone and all Jack heard was loud shouting.

Jack didn’t want to deal with it, he really didn’t. Geoff was out for the weekend with Gus and Burnie for some shit Jack forgot about, leaving Jack as the one to look after the other four men he worked with.

It wasn’t until he heard another, much louder shout of anger that brought Jack out of his chair with an annoyed sigh. Whatever they were doing, Jack knew it wasn’t good and as he followed the automatic arrows of other workers pointing him to the lads, he sighed again. They were pointing outside, and as he stepped out, he saw the bizarrest thing yet, and that was saying something when it came to Team Lads.

Gavin, Michael and Ray were yelling nonsense and laughing loudly around what looked like a mound, and no Ryan in sight. At first Jack stopped walking, thinking for some reason that the lads had just buried Ryan for no reason before he heard Ryan shouting from where the others were.

Jack hurried to the lads and just stood there, absolutely dumbfounded.

The three younger men seemed to dance around a very deep hole, almost taller than Gavin and Ray combined in height, and down in the hole, unable to get out on his own, looking very furious, stood Ryan.

“What the fuck?” Jack cried, looking between the younger men and Ryan in the hole.

“No way in! No way out!” Ray was chanting, completely ignoring Jack and laughing like a child.

“Now he knows how poor Edgar feels!” Michael cried, Gavin saying something similar through his own laughter.

“Holy fuck, get him out of there, you asses!” Jack demanded, whacking the closest lad, who happened to be Ray. The man stumbled, almost pitching headfirst into the hole.

“Aw, c’mon, we’re just showing him how Edgar feels, being trapped in a stupid hole all day with no way out.” Gavin defended, but he and Michael were already falling onto their stomachs and reaching out for Ryan.

“I am so going to kill you.” Jack heard Ryan seethe as the two lads struggled to get the trapped man out.

“When is this ever okay? You do not just trap a person in a hole!” Jack reprimanded fiercely.

“We weren’t gunna leave him in there for long, Jack.” Michael said, a little breathless from the exertion pulling Ryan out of the hole. “It was just a joke, ya know?”

“How is trapping someone in a hole they can’t get out of a _joke?”_ Jack demanded, and with the combined angry looks of both him and Ryan, the laughter left the lads as they realized they really fucked up. “Do we really need the Lasses to come beat your asses again?”

“No!” The three tensed at the mention of getting the girls involved. While it was fun to joke with them, once they learn of this, they’d be pissed. “Please don’t tell them!”

Ryan ruffled his hair, getting loose dirt out with a still pissed off face. “You even think about doing that again, and not only will I tell them, I’ll get them to help pick your gravestones.”

To say the least, that came off loud and clear to the lads, who all nodded fiercely before Jack shooed them back into the building, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Another rule?” Ryan asked after a few deep breaths, glancing at the hole he had just been freed from.

“Oh yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last one shot for this thing! I know there are over a hundred I could have used, but I felt like these four were good enough the way they were.  
> Poor Ryan.


End file.
